Has anyone seen that Gas-X commercial?

I know, I know. I said that I would update everyday, and now it has been a few days. Well, sometimes stuff comes up. So lets go over everything that you missed out on. Friday ended on a high note. I felt great and was very optimistic. I did forget though another one of the laws of recuperation, one good day, one bad day. Saturday was not too enjoyable to put it lightly. The gas pains from the previous night returned, and this time they decided to stay. As if the constant pain of air jockeying for position with my organs was not enough, the residents decided to pay me a visit in order to examine and hopefully remedy my hematoma. While I was fortunate that one of them at least had some bedside manner, it would be of little comfort. The best course of action was determined to be to remove two of the six staples holding my incision together, and then to encourage my hematoma to drain on its own. This doesn't sound so bad, and even the staples (the sight of which make me shudder while thinking of a horrible office equipment malfunction) weren't too bad to take out. The "encouraging" of the hematoma to drain however consisted of one of the residents essentially putting all of her weight on my incision in an effort to push some of the clotted blood out and jump start the draining process. Did I also mention that the area around my incision is also basically a 4x6 bruise? Needless to say, this was the only time that I can recollect yelling in pain during a medical procedure. Fortunately for me, the "procedure" was a "success," and the residents packed my wound and went on there way. Wait! Did I explain the whole "packing" process yet? No? Well you are in for a treat. After my incision was so carefully opened, I was left with an opening in my abdomen that roughly shares its width and depth with the Grand Canyon. But we can't just suture this thing up. In order for it to properly drain, it has to heal from the inside out. So how does that happen? Well three times a day, it has to be repacked. The repacking consists of taking the old dressing out, and then shoving as much gauze as will fit into the opening in my body into my body. Very soothing. I have yet to complete my first one of these procedures unassisted, but the night is young.

Aside from learning the ins and outs of this new-found hobby, I also spent much of Saturday fighting off nausea (a battle which I lost at least once and resulted in what I believe Montezuma's Revenge feels like), going to the bathroom about every hour and a half (I can look forward to going 15-20 times a day for the first couple of weeks), and gritting my teeth through gas pains. All of the nurses commented on how I was some superstar for not taking any pain meds. The only problem with that is that I would have been happy to take them, had any been available that would combat the pain that I was having. Oh well, I'll take what I can get. After all of this excitement, I was happy to spend the remainder of the day watching episodes of Lost and trying to rest.

Sunday I awoke in much better condition and spirits. The gas pains were still there, but a bit lessened. I just tried to avert my eyes during the repackings. And I was finally back on some full liquids. Not much happened this day. I continued my regular trips to the bathroom. I watched more of Lost. My nausea built throughout the day until I could not eat. And I was presented with the theory (their word, not mine) of how my hematoma came to be. Apparently, it can also be caused by a blood vessel that has not been tied off or cauterized during surgery. That's right, they tie them off. Pretty horrific. This was the agreed upon theory by my surgical team. It was also explained to me that at least one member of the team wanted to bring me back into the OR to fix this blood vessel. Nothing beats two surgeries in as many days. Luckily, this hapless fellow was over-ruled.

So now it is Monday night. Things are going much better, and I hope to be released tomorrow. I have finally eaten some solid foods without wanting to throw-up. I am still spending a lot of time in the bathroom, but what else is new? I just have to get a little more comfortable with the repacking, and I will be good to go. The I will have to come back in a week or so for a follow-up and for staple removal. Seriously, they are pretty gross. I promise to update everyone on my progress, but it probably won't be everyday.